If He Is the Right One...
Updated: Oct 17, 2018
...you probably don't need to be reading this article! But for all those of our friends out there, still a bit uncertain in your relationship and looking for assurance that you're on the right path with the right one, well, I've got both good news and bad news for you. The bad news is that no one can ever tell you whether or not he is The One for you—only you can determine that for yourself. But the good news is that if you just take a step back to reflect on the time-tested fundamentals of romantic relationships, you'll soon be able to judge for yourself, even if you had been relying heavily on those pretty little rose-tinted glasses!
All of us should know what that means. Yet, somehow, when it comes to relationships, respect is sometimes allowed to take a backseat, and one party may even begin to make excuses for the other. I don’t mean that he pushes you around or abuses you, but really, does he respect your opinion when you discuss, say, politics with him? Or perhaps your career choices? Or maybe your choice of dressing?
He loves you for who you are—even if that means watching Happy Feet with you every Saturday morning just because it makes you happy or listening to you quote Fifty Shades of Grey all the time or maybe it's dueting with you—even though you both know your singing is dreadfully off-key! If he joins you at your favorite activity despite its kookiness, trust me, he is a keeper. No one is going to stay pretty and young all their life, and your guy should be mature enough to know that and 'love you simple, love you glamorous.'
If he can be happy for you to go on a weekend getaway to Thailand with your girlfriends, if he doesn’t bat an eyelid when you say you are going to spend your Sunday afternoon hanging out with your guy friend because he has just been jilted, this boyfriend of yours is for keeps. No one wants a possessive partner for life. It may seem sweet and adorable, at first, that he gets jealous and whiny, but you don't want to have to deal with that and have to report your every movement for the rest of your life. It might even put a strain on your relationship, even before you say “I do.”
He practices what he preaches and always keeps his promises. His word is golden and his buddies can vouch for that. If he is committed to the relationship, it would not only be his words but his actions that impress you and prove that you matter to him and you are the center of his universe.
Don’t ask him if you look fat in that red dress you just bought, please, this guy just doesn't know how to lie through his teeth to please you. Just by looking at his body language you can detect if something is amiss, and there's almost nothing he can hide from you. Your guy should be the last person in the world to hide the truth from you. Honesty is a crucial component in a long-term relationship.
When he is angry, he will tell you. He doesn't believe in sulking off in the corner and neither does he believe in piling the blame on you—even if you are totally in the wrong! He knows to be reasonable and he listens to understand how you feel. But ultimately, he enjoys just talking to you and spending time with you without distractions.
Written by Kally Tay Edited by Priscilla Lai
* Kally Tay is a writer who used to be a bride from Annabel Law Productions and a friendship blossomed with Bel after her wedding. She loves to share her knowledge of being a mum and her corporate experiences though her blog at Middle Me.